have you forgotten how to play?

At precisely what age do we forget how to play?

At least 10 times per week my youngest child, who is just a month shy of five, asks me to 'play' with her.  The request is simple, yet so daunting.

Read me a book?  I got that covered, with voices, animation and enthusiasm to spare.  

Color a picture with me?  Right on.  I love to color, and would never take the time to do it if not asked.

Board game?  Rules and directions clearly defining the goal and purpose of the next 30 minutes...sounds lovely.

Play with me.  Like play, play?  Down on the floor, you say, make-believing?  Oh man-----my brain goes into 'danger' mode and my heart rate speeds up.  Sirens blare the warning:  YOU ARE NOW ENTERING A FOREIGN TERRITORY, BEWARE.

I don't remember when I lost the ability to play.  It seems I haven't always been this way.  Somewhere between childhood and motherhood it flittered away.  At some point, imagination was replaced with reality.  And reality bites.

Okay, so not really, but I couldn't resist.  My reality is pretty downright AH-MAZ-ING.  But still, reality, in general, pales in comparison to what can be imagined and dreamed.

I am reading "Anne of Green Gables" with my oldest daughter, and I blame this introspection on that very thing.  The character of Anne is nothing if not fanciful and filled with imagination and wonder.  She constantly challenges the adults in her life to imagine things greater than they are.  

Maybe I should quit reading so much, it prompts too much self-change.    

I think I may be found on the floor of the living room today.  Letting my five year old teach me how to play.

diving into controversy

I step into this water with great trepidation.  I may be labeled preachy.  Maybe a bit hypocritical.  And of course, judgmental.  Nothing I haven't heard before, I guess.

Let me preface everything that I'm going to say with the following statements:

1.  I did a lot of stupid things as a child while figuring out my boundaries and building relationships.

2.  I made a ton of BAD choices in the 'choosing' and 'being' a friend areas.

3.  I fully suspect that I was not abnormal, and that all kids and teens go through this.

4.  I had active, involved, and prayerful parents.

5.  I am CERTAIN that they made the difference in my successful navigation through adolescence.

As I attempt to parent my children, along with my husband, through what has to be some of the toughest technological circumstances in the history of mankind, I am often overwhelmed and fearful.  Social media and technology is their reality.  As much as note passing and 'cruising' was mine.

In our home, our oldest two children have Instagram accounts.  But guess what?  So does their mama.  Although I love the picture filter qualities Instagram offers, that is not what prompted my membership.  Being familiar with the 'ins' and 'outs' of the playground my children are on, is what prompted me to join.  Following them, is what prompted me.  Viewing what they view, is what prompted me.

Here's a shocking statement, are you ready?  THERE IS NOTHING EVIL ABOUT INSTAGRAM.

You read that right.  Nothing.  But there is some pretty crappy kid behavior out there.  Maybe not anything that I didn't think about or possibly do.  But thank God, no one was following me around at school recording every facial expression, every inappropriate clothing choice, or every muttered word that slipped past my lips.  Because I tell you what----those parents I mentioned above.....they would have stepped in.  QUICKLY.

My kids, and their friends, know that I am on Instagram.  And many of their friends quickly asked to 'follow' me.  Which makes me wary of those that did not :)  My kids know that their iPod may be for their use, but is under my jurisdiction.  They know that at any given time I can and will scroll through posts, messages, games, etc.  Their device doesn't follow them into their rooms at night, or even during the day.  It is used in the 'social' areas of our home.  It rarely, if ever leaves the house, and certainly not without permission.  I am not dumb enough to believe that there aren't ways around my watchful eyes.

So, I TALK TO THEM FAR MORE THAN I STALK THEM.

I know they will make mistakes!  I did.  A LOT.  But that isn't an excuse to say, "Well, kids will be kids."  Yes they will.  That's why God gave them parents.

I am horrified by some of what I see.  Not horrified because I can't imagine a child or teen making such a poor choice....horrified because obviously they aren't intimidated at all by the fact that adults (preferably) their parents may see it.

I know that my kids have and will make many poor choices in their journey into adulthood.  I know that they will comment something inappropriate, post something questionable, and do something stupid for all to see.  I plan to be there when they do; not to cover it up, pretend it didn't happen, or whisk it under the rug.  But to parent them through it.  And prayerfully, with a shred of the Godly wisdom and grace that my parents used while teaching me.

revisited because i used this one just last night

*Originally posted February 22, 2007

Wonder what Lent really is?

Here's the analogy that I used with my kids:

Remember in the movie "Cars" when Lightening McQueen gives up his chance at victory because he fails to see the need for a pit-stop? Remember how his tires blow out in the final lap because he didn't take the necessary break to replace them and get tuned-up? That's what lent is for Christians.

It is a time to jump off of the race track of life and pull in for a pit-stop for some much needed maintenance. It's admitting that we can't do it alone. It's saying to our Crew Chief that the sacrifice He made for us did not go unnoticed and through a few small sacrifices of our own we wish to acknowledge His suffering on our behalf.

It's about pouring the Word of God into our tanks and siphoning out some of the world. It's about rotating our priorities. It's about changing the thick, sluggish habits we've allowed to overtake us and replacing them with fresh new ones that will help us run more smoothly with those around us.

Many who misunderstand the purpose of Lent see it as some ritual used by instituted religions as a means of attaining merits, or a way to stock pile good deeds in hopes of achieving Heaven. That is so wrong.

It has nothing to do with our deeds and everything to do with His. Our sacrifices, no matter how large or small, could never merit us the sacrifice He willingly offered. Lent is a time to pray, "beyond my acceptance that I can not earn my salvation, I want to show my thankfulness in a tangible way. I want to sacrifice and take on things that have become challenging for me and stand in the way of my spiritual journey. I want to join my small suffering with the suffering of the cross and offer them as a sacrifice to you, Oh Lord, that you may turn my sorrows into dancing!"